Well I haven’t really had allot of time to write in this. The odds are that my posting is going to decrease by quite a bit. I’ve just been so busy. I’ve become less dependent on writing down my thoughts in life. I use to write about crap just to make my life sound more interesting to me. I used this to make myself believe that I was a good person, A good friend, Just so I could see myself in a more positive manner. I have succeeded in doing this without Xanga. I have learned to know myself better. I know what I want and need. Xanga just didn’t make the cut. Therefore I’m going to strive for what I want and need which leaves no time for this. I might post every now and then. I want to live my life to the full existent….Starting now.

Bye Bye

§ierra

Life is still very pretty much boring. Sleep, eat, work, school, and some times Inu-Yasha. No time for counter-strike.  Not really time for much now adays. . Boring yet chaotic. I guess I asked for it…lol. I just want to move. Why…is it taking so long…No Idea? There have been a few bumps in the road. Horses to sell before we move…any one need a horse…lol. What’s starting to piss me off though is that these messages keep poping up on my screen from yahoo meassenger service. They just won’t go away. Jazz …School=Stress    Work=Stress     Sleep=only break       Thinking about things I want to do with my life=Stress       Amount of time I have to decide=Stress                            Inu-yasha=only thing I really look forward to…sad…yes I know.       Plano=always trying to get there=goal. My room still looks the same from when I was 15. I really need to change it. It looks stupid now that I look at it. Crap that I thought was cool when I was 15. I hate living in the middle of nowhere. I have no social life. Which which makes really hard to be a teenager. All my old friends had to sneak out. I never did. I never had to because there was never anywhere to go. I miss being able to walk somewhere. I miss my car more. I hate being helpless. I’m use to everything happening the way a plan it but lately that hasn’t happened at all. I want to get to know myself better. I haven’t had fun in so long I can’t remember what I think is fun. Mother fucking yahoo messenger pop up bull-hockey. I’ve had at least 10 pop ups well just typing this. Well I have people to e-mail…c-ya later

§ierra

Well things have been pretty dull around here. My brother hasn’t found the time to return my car yet. I have money but nothing I really want to spend it on. I’m lucky I found someone to car pool to work with otherwise I’d really have nothing to waste my time on at all. I wish my life were a tad more eventful. I hope that in a good way. I really try and avoid chaos, but perhaps that’s exactly what I need. I’m starting to fill a little withdrawn from everything. The only thing that I look forward to these days is my cartoons and going to Plano to see my boyfriend. Ya…Kind of lame I know. I’ve been bored 75% of my life. I need to make more friends. I have a hard time likening other people though. So to the people I do get along with…Yes I’m talking to you…loll…You’re the people that I hold dear…My new friends and my one’s I’ve known since 3rd grade…My old friends that have moved away or chose a different path. None of you will be forgotten for always being there for me when I needed you most. Some I have good memories others are bad but memories none the less. To some of you I’m sorry for saying or doing things best not said or done. I forgive all of you that said or did things best not said or done. I don’t think many of my friends know I have a Xanga account but some things just need to be said…lol. I like to babble on allot. So cheers to all you people who were there for me. I hope I made a difference in at least one of your lives. Ok I think that about raps up that subject. Changed my picture…yay. I went with a pink shirt for the pink theme I have going. As for school it’s going well. I’m passing. I’m proud of myself…lol. As for you that don’t know I do my school work over the Internet. I wish there was something to drink in this house besides water. I’m worried about Rick…it’s been far to long since I’ve seen him. It’s about 2:00am and I still can’t sleep. This insomnia is getting a little out of hand. I wish I didn’t get it so bad. For some reason it’s worse around my time of the month. I can never sleep then. Maybe I need to be more active so that when I’m ready for bed I’m extremely warn out. Well I’m going to go and entertain myself…C-ya.

§ierra

Well…Allot of stuff has happened since my last update. I haven’t had much time for the Internet lately. We sold 3 horses, which were a pain in the ass to load in the horse trailer. So now we only have 4 horses left. Someone is coming to buy my horse Brezzy tomorrow. I had to load a horse today in the mud and rain, which wasn’t fun at all. I wasn’t even supposed to be here. Yesterday I was going to go to Plano and stay a week. My uncle David wouldn’t let me stay with him because he wanted to spend some time alone with his Internet girlfriend over the Internet. (It was her birthday.) I don’t want to be to rude or something but I kind of wish she would die so he can stop being such a creep. I was pissed about that because it took me 2 days to set up and I got a new job so my mom would bring me. I had to pay for gas. Well at least I have money now. On a good point I’m going to get my car back soon. My brother’s friend Tin from Hong Kong is letting my brother use his Mustang 1967. Tin went home for Christmas break and they won’t let him back in the country to finish college because of some terrorist threat bullshit. So my brother is going to clean out his apartment for him and put his stuff in storage until he can get back. If they won’t let him come back Tin is going to have him mail his stuff back and let Zac keep the car. I hope they let him come back…poor Tin. All I know is I want my car back. I need to get a license bad. I’m just too lazy to go get one. I know I’ll have to get one sooner or later. I think I’m actually going to try and keep this job at least so I have money to spend. Well sick of typing…I don’t know how Steven_k can type so long I get bored with it fast…lol

§ierra